Tag: women

Everyone Loves Their Mother

by JC Bowman, posted in Holidays, JC Bowman

It might not always be true, but it is as close to the truth as you might find on Mother’s Day: Everybody loves their mother. For the longest time, my customized ring tone for my own Mom was Merle Haggard’s song “Mama Tried”. The song was an ode to all of us out there, who didn’t always listen to their moms. No matter how much you thank the woman who does it all for her children, once a year is never enough.

Mother’s Day is certainly one of the most celebrated days of the year, and rightly so. Mothers hold a special place in our hearts. There is an unbreakable bond between Mother’s and their children. The prophet Jeremiah wrote about being set aside even before birth. “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you.”

Mothers know and love us as we grow inside of them. They love us even before they meet us. It is a love that goes beyond explanation, it brings out the strongest emotions in the human soul. Her raw feelings will run deep and certain, she will expose her deepest emotions to protect her children. She knows the baby she holds in her arms will grow quickly. A mother’s love is the closest thing most children will experience to God’s love for us.

I am occasionally jealous of my wife, at least sometimes. Our children will call her and share stories of my grandchildren, their careers, or just about life. I get the information second hand because she is their confidant and advisor. I have deep conversations with them, but not as frequent and not as intimate. It is just part of her role as a Mom. And I admit I was just as guilty with my own mother, sharing things I would not tell my own dad. It is normal.

There are times only when the love of a Mother can comfort us. Her love helps take away our worries and frustrations. Most of the time our Mom knows the right words to speak to us. “Mothers are the strongest and first connection we make in life,” according to writer David Kessler. That bond is seldom, if ever, broken.

Judith Orloff, a psychiatrist and author of The Empath’s Survival Guide wrote: “Mothers have a sixth sense about their kids because of their strong connection genetically, emotionally and by virtue of carrying the child in their womb for nine months,” She adds, “Adopted mothers can also feel this connection on a soul level, and their intuition can reach out to save their children too.” We should reflect on a mother’s sacrifice of tears, toil and time.

We could never set aside enough days in a year, or hours in a week to honor the women that shape and inspire our lives daily. We should remember the mothers, wives, daughters, aunts, sisters, grandmothers, mothers-in-law, stepmothers, godmothers, friends, teachers and all women in our lives this Mother’s Day.

– – –

 JC Bowman is executive director of Professional Educators of Tennessee, a non-partisan teacher association headquartered in Nashville. 

What I Didn’t Say

by JC Bowman, posted in JC Bowman, Leadership, Professional Educators of Tennessee, Tennessee Education

Candice-McQueen-at-appointment-press-conference

I had several news organizations call and/or email for a statement on the departure of Tennessee Department of Education Commissioner Candice McQueen.  I hastily put together my thoughts, and wrote:

“Professional Educators of Tennessee appreciates the contributions of Commissioner Candice McQueen.  Commissioner McQueen is one of the most visible members of the Haslam Administration.   She took over the Department during a dark period in public education, and she made a significant difference within the Department, particularly in the infrastructure.  Those changes are not readily noticeable, as they include systems, processes and human capital.  There are some exceptional people within the Department of Education working to make public education a success in our state.  It is unfortunate that online testing continues to be a point of contention, but the state is moving in a positive direction.  The next Commissioner of Education and the 111th Tennessee General Assembly will need to make adjustments in student assessment as we move forward.   We will always be grateful to Commissioner McQueen for her unwavering support of increasing teacher salaries and commitment to student literacy.  These are incredible legacies to leave as she departs her critical role serving the citizens of Tennessee, and we wish Commissioner McQueen much success in her new role.   We look forward to working with Governor-elect Bill Lee and offering input on a successor.”

That’s what professionals do.  We issue statements and offer public comments about people and issues.  There is a right way and a wrong way to do that task.  In an era where we seemingly delight in lack of civility and negative tone of politics, we must take the high road.   We are polarized as a country, not because we are afraid to discuss issues of substance, but rather we cannot talk to each other in a respectful manner.  It’s easier for some to just be what my mom used to classify as “rude, crude and uncalled for.”  In the end, we merely see who can be the loudest in the room, and end up talking over each other.

What does that have to do with a statement on the Departure of a Haslam Cabinet official?  Simple, it brings out the ugly.  And I have seen some mean-spirited people critical of Commissioner McQueen, as she moves into the next phase of her career.  Most of those being critical are clueless.  To paraphrase Shakespeare, “In a battle of wits, they are unarmed.”

Tupac Shakur said, “Behind every sweet smile, there is a bitter sadness that no one can ever see and feel.” I spent time with Commissioner McQueen as more than a casual observer. Her heart and passion were always for the children and teachers in Tennessee.  She fought battles which nobody knew about and which, despite the lofty title in front of her name, she had little control.  While we didn’t always agree on every issue, it was always a discussion she was willing to have with me, as well as others. She made it a priority to discuss teacher issues with me regularly, and as needed as frequently as possible.  That alone will always endear her to the teachers who were included in those discussions.

Candice McQueen is a woman of faith.  That is an element that we need more of in public service.  She didn’t wield her faith as a sword, but you knew that she was a believer in Jesus Christ.  She had a preference for ideas over politics.  She chose principle over popularity.  She took ownership of a testing debacle, that she had inherited and didn’t even pick the people who oversaw it.  She could have easily laid blame elsewhere.  She chose not to do that.  She wisely fired a failed testing company.   She was not a seasoned politician.  If you recall legislative hearings, she sat there and took valid criticism of a flawed system.  However, that critique often crossed the line personally.

Candice McQueen symbolized the hope for a more decent and gentler public servant, willing to acknowledge faults in a system—and personally owning them.  Whereas Harry Truman said, “The buck stops here,” McQueen also took ownership while at the same time working to correct the issues.  (Much like building an airplane while at the same time trying to fly it.)  She did this while remaining optimistic and energetic.  From first-hand knowledge, I know she frequently started her work day before 6:00 AM and often finished it after 9:00 PM, even though she was a mother and wife.  Commissioner McQueen will be missed.

As far as the next Commissioner of Education goes, I imagine it will be much harder to fill her shoes than most people realize.  The next Commissioner must make sure she/he has direct access to the new Governor, with complete authority to make changes as needed.  The Governor, not the Commissioner of Education, must fight the legislative battles.  We need a true public servant we can also work with, who understands Tennessee and our educators.

The beautiful thing about legacies is that time is a fair-minded judge.  I suspect that Candice McQueen, like Lana Seivers who served years before her, will be seen as a Commissioner who helped build a modern Department of Education which meets the needs of districts, educators, parents and children.  Tennessee is moving forward in education, and we all should be proud of our accomplishments.

##

JC Bowman is the Executive Director of Professional Educators of Tennessee, a non-partisan teacher association headquartered in Nashville, Tennessee. Permission to reprint in whole or in part is hereby granted, provided that the author and the association are properly cited. For more information on this subject or any education issue please contact Professional Educators of Tennessee.

Mothers, Wives and Everlasting Love

by JC Bowman, posted in Holidays, JC Bowman, Professional Educators of Tennessee

 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Mother.  Perhaps no other word speaks to as many people in any language or touches our heart.  Yet, when we write about mothers, the words rarely do justice to the subject.  We are rarely able to show our gratefulness to the women in our lives, the women who gave us life, or to those who give life to our children.  Mother is a word that sparks deep self-reflection when you reflect about the amazing importance this woman has on your life, growth as a person, or significance to your children it is inconceivable.   The hand of a bride becomes the hand of a mother, and the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.

Before the man even discovers that he is going to be a father, the woman knows.   A myriad of emotions runs through her brain, some of them at the same time.  She may be anxious, afraid, confused or unprepared. And on the roller coaster ride of emotions, she will also be excited, happy, and joyful as they are about to embark on this life-changing journey.  Having a baby is undeniably hard work.   The best gift for a mother-to-be is continual support and assurance from those around her is that she can navigate this stage of life.  She does not know it yet, but she was created for this role and she will be ready for the moment.

The prophet Jeremiah wrote about being set aside even before birth.  “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” Mothers know and love us as we grow inside of them.  They love us even before they meet us. It is a love that goes beyond explanation, it brings out the strongest emotions in the human soul.  Her raw feelings will run deep and certain, she will expose her deepest emotions to protect her children.  She knows the baby she holds in her arms will grow quickly. A mother’s love is the closest thing most children will experience to God’s love for us.

You never have to earn a mother’s love, nor could you buy it.  It is freely given.  And her love will last until her dying breath. Her prayers for her children are never-ending.  She may stay in a challenging marriage for the security and well-being of her children or escape for their safety.   She may be abused, verbally, physically or both.  She will put the needs of her children above her own.  She gave us life, never asking for anything in return.

Author Donna Ball wrote in At Home on Ladybug Farm: “Motherhood is a choice you make every day to put someone else’s happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is, … and to forgive yourself over and over again for doing everything wrong.” For those who have lost their mother, whether recent or long ago, the day is particularly bittersweet.  Rutgers Professor Deborah Carr reminds us the day is: “marked by fading memories, or musings about what ‘could have been…’ if our mothers were still alive today.”

Mother’s Day isn’t just an activity designed to sell holiday cards to reflect on a mother’s compassion and influence.  If language is everything, we could not, even if we tried, honor the women that shapes and inspires our lives.   No matter how much you thank the woman who does it all for her children, once a year is never enough.  However, we must reflect on a mother’s sacrifice of tears, toil and time.  We must also acknowledge the unique value, vision and virtue of women.  So, to all the mothers, wives, daughters, aunts, sisters, grandmothers, mothers-in-law, stepmothers, godmothers, friends, teachers, and all women that have everlasting love for children, we honor you this Mother’s Day.

##

JC Bowman is the Executive Director of Professional Educators of Tennessee, a non-partisan teacher association headquartered in Nashville, Tennessee.  You can follow him on his blog at www.jcbowman.com 

 

Mothers, Wives and Everlasting Love

by JC Bowman, posted in Holidays, JC Bowman, Professional Educators of Tennessee

 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Mother.  Perhaps no other word speaks to as many people in any language or touches our heart.  Yet, when we write about mothers, the words rarely do justice to the subject.  We are rarely able to show our gratefulness to the women in our lives, the women who gave us life, or to those who give life to our children.  Mother is a word that sparks deep self-reflection when you reflect about the amazing importance this woman has on your life, growth as a person, or significance to your children it is inconceivable.   The hand of a bride becomes the hand of a mother, and the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.

Before the man even discovers that he is going to be a father, the woman knows.   A myriad of emotions runs through her brain, some of them at the same time.  She may be anxious, afraid, confused or unprepared. And on the roller coaster ride of emotions, she will also be excited, happy, and joyful as they are about to embark on this life-changing journey.  Having a baby is undeniably hard work.   The best gift for a mother-to-be is continual support and assurance from those around her is that she can navigate this stage of life.  She does not know it yet, but she was created for this role and she will be ready for the moment.

The prophet Jeremiah wrote about being set aside even before birth.  “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” Mothers know and love us as we grow inside of them.  They love us even before they meet us. It is a love that goes beyond explanation, it brings out the strongest emotions in the human soul.  Her raw feelings will run deep and certain, she will expose her deepest emotions to protect her children.  She knows the baby she holds in her arms will grow quickly. A mother’s love is the closest thing most children will experience to God’s love for us.

You never have to earn a mother’s love, nor could you buy it.  It is freely given.  And her love will last until her dying breath. Her prayers for her children are never-ending.  She may stay in a challenging marriage for the security and well-being of her children or escape for their safety.   She may be abused, verbally, physically or both.  She will put the needs of her children above her own.  She gave us life, never asking for anything in return.

Author Donna Ball wrote in At Home on Ladybug Farm: “Motherhood is a choice you make every day to put someone else’s happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is, … and to forgive yourself over and over again for doing everything wrong.” For those who have lost their mother, whether recent or long ago, the day is particularly bittersweet.  Rutgers Professor Deborah Carr reminds us the day is: “marked by fading memories, or musings about what ‘could have been…’ if our mothers were still alive today.”

Mother’s Day isn’t just an activity designed to sell holiday cards to reflect on a mother’s compassion and influence.  If language is everything, we could not, even if we tried, honor the women that shapes and inspires our lives.   No matter how much you thank the woman who does it all for her children, once a year is never enough.  However, we must reflect on a mother’s sacrifice of tears, toil and time.  We must also acknowledge the unique value, vision and virtue of women.  So, to all the mothers, wives, daughters, aunts, sisters, grandmothers, mothers-in-law, stepmothers, godmothers, friends, teachers, and all women that have everlasting love for children, we honor you this Mother’s Day.

##

JC Bowman is the Executive Director of Professional Educators of Tennessee, a non-partisan teacher association headquartered in Nashville, Tennessee.  You can follow him on his blog at www.jcbowman.com